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hi.

welcome to our perfectly imperfect life.

my vbac story.

my vbac story.

Have you ever trained really hard for a marathon? Like that’s all you thought about, dreamed about, and have wanted to accomplish...then actually crossed the finish line?

No? Me neither...but I can imagine this is how I would feel if I did.

3 out of 4 members of the household are currently wearing diapers, but I finally got the birth experience I have been dreaming about-and I have never felt so accomplished before in my life.

1 TBSP castor oil
2 TBSP almond butter
1 cup of Chardonnay
1 cup of apricot juice

That’s all it took to throw my body into labor. Who woulda thunk?

Contractions were on and off for a day or so until they came and kept coming Sunday night.
Side-note...why do women always go into labor in the middle of the night?
Anyway...we went to the hospital around 1am, things were pretty slow. Shocker.
I’ve decided my cervix has a new nickname
//<turvix>\\ (turtle cervix)

They broke my water, because apparently my body won’t do it on its own to try and speed things up. And boy did it ever.

This was the only flashback I had to Emys birth. I stood up after they broke my water and a big bloody gush of water came pouring down my legs and onto the floor. I felt myself going into full panic mode. Heart racing, uncontrollable crying, and flashbacks to last time. It was like a concrete block had been laid on my chest. I could barely breathe. How in the actual F is this happening again?!
Jon just held me as I pulled myself together. The nurses cleaned up the floor and assured me it was normal. It was NOT happening again. Whew. 

Contractions started right after that, and were much stronger.
🙋🏻‍♀️ epidural please.

I was about 6cm when they numbed me up, and boy was I grateful. I literally went from 6-10 cm in my dreams. Modern medicine is an amazing thing.

I’ll never forget when the nurse came in and said “alright mama, you’re ready to push. He is RIGHT THERE.”

ummm what?! I can’t feel my legs. I feel like I am the lead on my 600 pound life. There’s no way in Hell I can push.

But I did. For about 15 minutes with my biggest support team holding my hair (and legs) back, cheering me on every second.

What an indescribable moment. To hear the doctor yelling “he’s right there! He’s got so much hair! Come on mama, you can do this!” And then setting that sweet screaming baby right on my chest. It’s that feeling every mom has been telling me about since I found out I was pregnant. I hope I never forget it.

I’ll be honest, there were some days I was so empowered to do this whole VBAC thing, but there were more days that I doubted myself.

Everyone has an opinion.


I learned to just listen to my body and to trust that whatever was supposed to happen, would happen.
The mind is a powerful tool. My support system were the shit.
And my body...did the damn thing.

Here’s to strong women.

And believing in yourself.

XO

we did it :)

Welcome to the world Walker.

Elijah Walker Magee

6.25.18

3:05pm

8 lbs 

21 in

total perfection.


 

i lied.

i lied.

not worth the wait.

not worth the wait.